~lili's secret garden~

add oil!! i definitely can do it !!!

2007-11-23T06:17:00.000-08:00

《红蜻蜓》飞呀飞呀,看那红色蜻蜓飞在蓝色天空游戏在风中不断追逐它的梦天空是永恒的家大地就是它的传说飞翔是生活我们的童年也象追逐成长吹来的风轻轻地吹着梦想慢慢地升空红色的蜻蜓是我小时候的小小英雄多希望有一天能和它一起飞当烦恼越来越多玻璃弹珠越来越少我知道我已慢慢地长大了红色的蜻蜓曾几何时也在我岁月慢慢不见了我们都已经长大好多梦正在飞就象童年看到的红色的蜻蜓我们都已经长大好多梦还要飞就象现在幸福中红色的蜻蜓

Psalms 42

2007-11-22T07:40:00.000-08:00

As the deer pants for streams of water,
so my soul pants for You, O God.
My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.
When can I go and meet with God?
My tears have been my food day and night
while men say to me all day long,
"Where is your God?"
These things I remember as I pour out my soul;
how I used to go with the multitude,
leading the procession to the house of God,
with shouts of joy and thanksgiving among the festive throng.
Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Savior and my God.
My soul is downcast within me;
therefore I will remember you from the land of Jordan,
the heights of Hermon from Mount Mizar.
Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls,
all your waves and breakers have swept over me.
By day the Lord directs his love,
at night his song is with me-
a prayer to the God of my life.
I say to God my rock,
"Why have you forgotten me?
Why must I go about morning oppressed by the enemy?"
Mo bones suffer mortal agony as my foes taunt me,
saying to me all day long
"Where is your God?"
Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I will yet praise him,
my Saviour and my God.

Pursue your dreams!!!

2007-10-23T01:46:00.000-07:00

我的未来不是梦

你是不是像我在太阳下低头
流着汗水默默辛苦的工作

你是不是像我就算受了冷漠
也不放弃自己想要的生活

你是不是像我整天忙着追求
追求一种意想不到的温柔

你是不是像我曾经茫然失措
一次一次徘徊在十字街头

因为我不在乎别人怎么说
我从来没有忘记我
对自己的承诺对爱的执著

我知道我的未来不是梦
我认真的过每一分钟
我的未来不是梦
我的心跟着希望在动

我的未来不是梦
我认真的过每一分钟

我的未来不是梦
我的心跟着希望在动
跟着希望在动

so near, yet so far...

2007-08-26T05:21:00.000-07:00

3 quizes coming up!! in the midst of preparing for the quizes, actually, i feel very stress! no idea of how the quizes going to be, how hard the questions will be. i guess this week has been a great challenge for me, especially in my rational understanding of the syllables, emotional-control of his absence, i totally agreed that absence really, truly and madly makes one's heart grow really fonder!!

friday night, i decided not to come back hometown, i just going to stay at home to study, study and study!! but... i guess my stress level is saturating and love sick is really terrible! still, i forced myself to sit down in front of my study table and open my books to read!

on saturday afternoon, it is kinda boring for me to face the books for the whole day. i remembered, there is a youth church service going on in GEPC. i messaged my friend to give me a lift there. in my heart, i am thinking, perhaps a break will release my stress out! the church building is comfortable, cold and nice. everyone begins to pray. i stood at one corner, silently, i prayed. i am first-timer there. besides the friends that i made in the cell group gathering, none of them there know me yet.

the presence of God is really strong there. i uttered my prayers silently in my heart. towards the end of the prayers, the pastor stood up and prayed for some of us. before he started to pray, he asked me what is my name. i answered in a shock manner. he told me that God still remembers my prayers long time ago. he told me that God still remembers my interceeding for that special one in my heart. God still count my tears and my knees. after so long since i graduated from pre-u, i have long ago not receiving such reminder from God. sometimes i really ask myself, i am not worthy for Him to love, why is He stil persist His love on me? i thought my journey with Him is scattered, yet, He repairs.

i am now at the cross-road of many things. everything seems to settle and falling into places in my life. however, when everything is falling into places, my heart gets more fearful. i don't know why. since this year, i have become one that likes to bottle up everything to myself. i rather hide myself in the room and cry out. perhaps, the secret place i have is with Him. i thought this secret is only in me. but He sees. He remembers. He comforts. i really wanting to run back to Him. why is He so near, yet so far? why? why and why?

on sunday morning, i were hestitated wanting to come back klang or not. i know my heart is stumbled and running like a rat if i don't get myself back klang. so, i drove all the way back and yeah, i guess i make a right decision. =) appreciate what we have around us, don't wait till we lost them only appreciate them.

well, i have to stop here. continue to add oil for my up-coming quizes. have a pleasant day everyone!!

When you are gone...i miss you

2007-08-21T07:00:00.000-07:00

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie
Is made up on your side
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you
I never felt this way before
Everything that I do
Reminds me of you
And the clothes you left
They lie on the floor
And they smell just like you
I love the things that you do
When you walk away
I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now?
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you
We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were
Yeah Yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I do I give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me
Yeah
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
And When you're gone
The words I need to hear will always get me through the day
And make it OK
I miss you

Forever Love... absence makes one's heart grow really fonder...

2007-08-14T06:54:00.000-07:00

Love it has so many beautiful faces
Sharing lives and sharing days
My love it has so many empty spaces
I'm sharing a memory now I hope that's how it stays
Now I'm deep inside love and still breathing
She is holding my heart in her hand
I'm the closest I've been to believing
this could be love forever
All throughout my life the reasons I've demanded
But how can I reason with the reason I'm a man
Oh, oh yeah, ummm huh
In a minute I'm needing to hold her
In an hour I'm cold, cold as stone
When she leaves it gets harder and
harder to face life alone
Now my dreams are filled with times when we're together
Guess what I need from her is forever love
Ooh, ooh yeah oooh umm
Oh, oh yeah
Now I feel forever love oooh
Oh, I feel

~general chemistry quiz~

2007-08-09T03:05:00.000-07:00

work loads is increasing!! tutorials, lab reports, assignments, presentations and quizes. next monday gonna have quiz for general chemistry quiz! so much to go, so much to understand. hehe... stress and sweats! anyhow, with persistency and hardwork, i hope i won't hand in a blank paper... most importantly, the strength from Divine above. =)

add oil everyone!!! jia you! jia you! jia you! don't give up!! dont' give up in achieveing your dreams!we can do it ya!

~way to piano teacher's house~

2007-08-06T08:02:00.000-07:00

20th august!! my piano theory exam for grade 8 is just around the corner! going extra miles for exercises and reviions, today, i have learnt the way to get to my piano teacher's house with a friend of mine. thanks so so much! =) i really appreciate your time and effort.

friends is the circle of life,
there is always friends come and go,
however,
there is only true friends will leave foot print in your heart.

when the war will end ?

2007-08-02T18:23:00.000-07:00

hidden hurts,
hidden cries,
hidden suffers,
who will ever comprehend?

i can feel,
the war is beginning,
the hurts are pouring,
the stress are coming.

is it really TRUE that LOVE will melt everything?
i have hurted him,
i know,
deep in my heart.
he changes his tones,
he changes his ways,
he changes his attitude.

who shall i blame?
i hate her.
but i can't blame her.
cause i love her.
who shall i blame?
myself?
i did nothing wrong..

i am just a normal girl that wants love in my life.
i am just a normal girl that wants comfort in my life.
i am just a normal girl that wants care in my life.
is that too much ?
till... that someone can did such a thing that i never expect?
why is it so?
why this war is started?

i wonder,
do i have energy to fight against?
i love him,
i truly love him.
i don't know how much he knows about my love,
one thing for sure,
i really love him.

So You Would Come

2007-07-31T02:21:00.000-07:00

SO YOU WOULD COME

BEFORE THE WORLD BEGAN,

YOU WERE ON HIS MIND

AND EVERY TEAR YOU CRY

IS PRECIOUS IN HIS EYES

BECAUSE OF HIS GREAT LOVE,

HE GAVE HIS ONLY SON

EVERYTHING WAS DONE,

SO YOU WOULD COME

NOTHING YOU CAN DO,

COULD MAKE HIM LOVE YOU MORE

AND NOTHING THAT YOU’VE DONE

COULD MAKE HIM CLOSE THE DOOR

BECAUSE OF HIS GREAT LOVE,

HE GAVE HIS ONLY SON

EVERYTHING WAS DONE,

SO YOU WOULD COME

CHORUS:

COME TO THE FATHER

THOUGH YOUR GIFT IS SMALL

BROKEN HEARTS, BROKEN LIVES,

HE WILL TAKE THEM ALL

THE POWER OF THE WORD,

THE POWER OF HIS BLOOD

EVERYTHING WAS DONE

SO YOU WOULD COME

~when i am in facing up many challeges in my life, physically, emotionally and spiritually, there is hope when there is unfailing love of Yours. The hidden tears You wipe, the hidden cries You listen, the inner strength You uphold..So You would come.~

song that speaks right to my heart... invisible wings...

2007-07-26T04:41:00.000-07:00

每一次都在徘徊孤单中坚强,

每一次就算很受伤也不闪泪光,

我知道我一直有双隐型的翅膀,

带我飞,飞过绝望,

不去想他们拥有美丽的太阳,

我看见每天的夕阳也会有变化

我知道我一直有双隐型的翅膀

带我飞,给我希望.

我终于看到所有梦想都开花

追逐的年轻歌声多嘹亮.

我终于翱翔用心凝望不害怕.

那里会有风就飞多远吧

不去想他们拥有美丽的太阳,

我看见每天的夕阳也会有变化

我知道我一直有双隐型的翅膀

带我飞,给我希望.

我终于看到所有梦想都开花

追逐的年轻歌声多嘹亮.

我终于翱翔用心凝望不害怕.

那里会有风就飞多远吧

隐型的翅膀

让梦很久比天长

留一个愿望让自己想象

one more! =)

2007-07-26T04:33:00.001-07:00

looking-alikes

2007-07-25T06:16:00.000-07:00

Courage...

2007-07-24T02:29:00.000-07:00

in last month, i have closed down my friendster's blog. it took me a very long time to make this decision and painfully i did. none of my friends know i make this decision. i am not significant for people to know about my blogs too. anyhow, i know for myself that my blog is the space for me to express my feelings and share what is in me to others. i actually decided not to have my own blog anymore. what is the point of having when pains keep coming in?

today, i bravely took my courage to type out my very first post after some times. it is really very hard to bottle up all your feelings just to yourself when you can't or don't know how to express to anyone. it is painful, dark though. no one understands. no one comprehends.

i am glad and thank God that i meet a bunch of new friends in my uni life. it is really touching and great meeting them. i hope in these years to come, we will continue to be great friends ever. hey friends that you know whom i mentioned.(especially cheryl, kumiko and kk) i really grateful to have you all. it is touching and fun having you all around every day of uni life. i just want to tell you all that, i might not be the bestEST friend of all, but i will be trueST friend to you all! i hope in this new pathway of my life, will be coloured beautifully by you all. take care and love you always!

thanks to kk today that you purposely drove your car out just to give me a ride to take my senior's labcoat back to college. i felt so sorry making you parking up hill. thanks a million for that! =)